3 Things You Must Know About Investing in Coaching

Welcome to episode 277 of “Hit the Mic with The Stacey Harris.”

Welcome to episode 277. I am of course your host, The Stacey Harris, social media strategist and trainer, helping online entrepreneurs really build communities through social media. Today we’re going to talk about hiring a coach. This could be a coach for anything, but I want to talk about the three things you need to know going into that. We’re going to kind of format these three things you must know as three questions I want you to ask yourself because this has been a game changer for me when it comes to finding out who or what I need to invest in my business.

We’re talking about this with coaching today and I’ve talked before about do you really need a coach. We did an episode of “Hit the Mic TV” on it. There’ll be a link in the show notes of this episode, so if you go over to thestaceyharris.com/episode277 you’ll see that. I talked about the power of investing in my business and what a game changer it’s been. Today I want to talk specifically about coaches because although programs have their place, I think coaches are the things that… Sometimes we forget to ask really important questions. We get all swept up in a sales call and in the momentum and the message and connecting. Well so and so says I need to or I read that I have to and sometimes we forget the hey, do I actually need this person at this point in my business?

It’s not that either one of you are wrong. It’s not that either one of you are not good at what you do or that there’s anything wrong with anyone involved in the situation. It’s just is this relationship the best relationship for me at this stage. That’s why I want to talk about these three questions because up until this last year, it’s not really something I had asked myself.

At the beginning of this year I knew I wanted something. I knew I needed to invest in the next stage of my business, and I had this desire to work with a coach. I had invested in some programs and implemented some new skills last year, but I hadn’t really worked with a coach in a while. I knew it was what I needed and what I wanted, and so I set out to find someone which was super not helpful. It mostly led to a lot of calls where I was like, “Yeah, that’s awesome. Okay. Thanks.” There wasn’t just like yes, this is what I need to move forward. A part of that was because I hadn’t asked these questions. I didn’t have the clarity to make a decision.

At the prompting of some friends of mine in a group I’m in, when I asked them about this, they said, well ask yourself a couple of questions and so I did and that’s what I’m bringing to you today, is those questions that I asked and the impact that they had in this decision making process, because it really truly was a game changer for how I thought about hiring a coach, investing in myself in that way.

Question number one, what do I need?

Meaning, what do I feel is missing from my business right now? For me, at this stage it was about accountability. It was about somebody who would push me to make the scary calls, to send the scary emails, to make the scary judgements in my business, to expand my thoughts. I didn’t need somebody who was going to help me understand sales funnels. I didn’t need somebody who was going to teach me XYZ skill. I’m not saying I’ll never need that again, but for right now, that’s not what I needed.

Getting really clear to start with on what you need is really, really powerful before you invest. Again, that makes these sales calls, when you go in to meet a coach, you can actually say, “So this is what I’m looking for. This is where I want to be. This is what I need help with.” You can get a clear look at if that’s a personality that’s going to help you. I’m really, really excited about who I’m working with now because our personalities work in a way that pushes me forward but also gives me someplace to land when I’m unsure. Gives me someplace to be like, I’m thinking, but I just need to know if this is insane. That was something that was really powerful because I knew again what I needed, so when I connected with coaches and I talked to a lot of people. I’ll be honest. I talked to a lot of people, and again I won’t say that I won’t invest with any of them ever. Just for right now, I found the fit that I needed. Again, this may not be the fit forever, but it’s the fit I need right now.

Question number two, what are my goals?

This seems really obvious in retrospect but until you can tell someone what you need help doing, where you’re trying to go, it’s going to be super hard for them to help you get there. Again, seems obvious, but this was a really and continues a really, really big one for me. Knowing where I’m going and having that clear communication, not just for being able to tell, from the perspective of being able to tell a coach, these are my goals. This is what I want to do, but also to be able to say, “This is where I’m going. Is the person I’m investing with someone who has that kind of understanding?”

Either they’ve done it themselves or they’ve supported someone in doing it. I would never hire for example, a speaking coach who’d never given a presentation. Why would I hire someone to coach me in my business who’s never developed the kind of revenue or business or put themselves out there in the way that I want and need to putting myself out there? I think that that for me was really really big clarity piece. Because full honestly … You guys know this show is about transparency. I got on a call with a lot, a lot of people who when I started talking about what I wanted to do and the pieces I was working to put in place in my business, they were like, “Oh my gosh. Wow. That’s really amazing.” Then they’d start asking me questions about how I’ve done what I’ve done.

That for me is a big red flag because I’m looking for somebody who can move me further, not who’s going to get pushed forward through what I’ve already done. I needed somebody who was going to be able to go, “Awesome. Here’s what I’ve done. This is what I’d like to help you do.” It’s not that I’m looking to work with, or you’re going to want to look for somebody who’s done exactly what you want to do, but just who’s experienced the kind of success you want to experience, who gets what it is you want to do and gets the hustle behind it. That’s really, really important and for me, that was something that it took a while for me to find. It absolutely took some time for me to find.

I will say that my coach definitely has a different business than I do. We’re not in the same industry. We’re not in the same space. There are things that I learned from her and there are things that she’s learned from me, although she’s invested to learn those things so it works out. It’s really, really important that you understand when you are investing with someone that they get where you’re going. That they see where you’re going is possible because if they don’t, because they haven’t done it or because they don’t get it or they think it’s not what someone should want, that’s not going to be the right relationship. Getting really clear on where you want to go is going to be really helpful in figuring that out.

The third thing, how am I best motivated?

This takes some real big honesty on your part and it’s something that it’s really easy to hide from, but it’s so important because if you don’t understand how you’re motivated, it’s going to be hard for you to choose someone who can motivate you. On the flip side, if you don’t know what definitely doesn’t motivate you, then you’re not going to be very motivated. For me, I’m somebody who does well with talking things through. I will generally get myself there if you just let me, if you just keep asking me the right questions. That’s one of the things I love about the coach I work with now, is she tends to get me there that way.

We were talking about something interesting and she was like, “Go listen to this and tell me your thoughts.” I listened to it and I was like, “Oh my gosh.” I wrote an entire email of like all of the things that had she just told me I would not have done or paid attention to. Just again, transparency. It’s about knowing yourself. Being super, super clear on how you’re motivated. If you need somebody who’s like drill sergeant style going to kick your ass, then you’re probably not going want to talk to somebody who’s like super introverted and like, “So, how are you feeling?” It doesn’t make either one of them wrong. It just makes them not a right fit for you. Get really clear on how you get motivated.

This also speaks to whether you’re going to want somebody who is exclusively one on one or somebody who is running a group or somebody who … Also the structure of how the relationship is. Is it only phone calls? Is it phone calls and emails? Is it email only, which is a totally cool option that I’ve never done but I think is really, really interesting, that a lot of coaches are I’ve seen offering. Again, how are you motivated? How do you best learn? How do you best get the push to execute, because that’s going to be helpful. For me, I knew I wanted a little bit of a group, because I knew I wanted not just the accountability of a coach, but I also wanted to be able to learn from what other people were doing.

I also wanted to be able to just … This is going to sound bizarre I think, but I am working at leveling up in my business. I’m working at hitting new revenue goals. I’m working at stretching myself and so I wanted to be surrounded by people who were also in that space. Maybe there are some people who are where I’m wanting to go. There are some people who are stretching in entirely new directions. There are some people who are making that stretch from just starting out to really being profitable. Whatever that stretch is, I wanted to be around people who were in that same space, who were looking to do more or go bigger because that fires me up. That absolutely inspires me, and so that’s really motivating.

I knew I wanted that, so figure out what works for you and how you are best motivated because that’s going to make all the difference when it comes down to deciding who’s the best fit. Again, one fit may not be the fit forever, and for people who aren’t a fit, it’s not that there’s anything wrong with them or you. It’s just that it’s not what you need right now. I know it’s easy when you see all these Facebook ads and these people raving about people and these fantastically written sales pages or these epic testimonials. You’re like oh my God, I have to have that to be successful, but you don’t you just need what’s gong to move you forward. All right? Okay.

Again, check out the show notes, thestaceyharris.com/episode277 for the other episodes. I’ll see you guys next time. Bye.

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